Carol the Coach: Don't Let Your Fears Hold You Back

Is there something in your life that you have really, really wanted to do and yet no matter how much you try… you never create the goals to make it happen? It is human to procrastinate especially if there is some fear or resistance that is holding you back.

As you look at these possible reasons for not completing goals, ask yourself if any of them resonate with you?

  • Sometimes you may feel that the goal is too difficult to accomplish and that it will require too many changes in your life. 
  • Other times you may want the goal to occur but you question whether you have what it takes to make the goal a reality.  Your self-esteem may be lacking and you really don't have belief in yourself.
  • Sometimes it may be that you struggle with timing as if your life is not conducive to accomplishing your goals. Perhaps you want the kids to get a little older or you'd like to take another course in college before you activate your goals. It is as if the stars have not lined up properly to make you feel comfortable enough to set up the change.
  • Some people are afraid that their changes will negatively affect others and so they put their loved ones needs before their own. When this happens, you must really assess what it is you want and how badly you want it. When you put off making a change, you can typically short change yourself!
  • Perhaps you feel that you are too lazy to implement your goals.

So what is your fear or resistance to changing your life and taking it to the next level. Let's assess if you have the variables to make your dreams happen.
Have you clearly delineated what changes you would like in your life?
Writing out your goals and making them very specific is the first step to goal setting because when you write them down, you are more likely to make them happen.

Have you reflected on them and spent some time imagining what achieving your goals would look like?

Can you identify what feelings come up for you?  What might you fear?
Did you know you're more likely to actualize goals if you imagine using all five senses and experience seeing the completion of that goal?  It's as if when you create the feeling of achieving the goal you're more likely to make it happen.

Have you assessed how you might make them happen? This might look like getting up a couple of hours earlier and setting aside two hours to research what you will need to do to make your calls happen.

Do you have the proper support, the infrastructure to make your goals happen? You may need to seek the support of your loved ones and ask them to help you coordinate a schedule that allows you to complete your goals.

Perhaps the obstacle is belief in yourself. Do you absolutely believe that you have what it takes to change something in your life? Do you have the energy, the aptitude, and the belief in yourself to make your life different?

Well it is time to face your fears and follow the formula above. It is normal to have resistance and fears. What you can’t do is let them hold you back. Find a support person, a counselor or a coach to support you through this process. This is not a dress rehearsal so take your life to the next level!

Carol Juergensen Sheets, LCSW PCC is a psychotherapist and personal life coach. SHe does motivational speaking and empowerment trainings locally and nationally. To find out more about her services, contact her at  www.carolthecoach.com or call her at 317-218-3479. You can watch Carol the Coach segments on WTHR's Channel 13 Wednesdays at 12:50PM.